Mile High Manifesto

It isn’t too often something like this happens so perfectly. In August I had no delusions that the Denver Broncos would be in the AFC Championship. And yet, here I sit on a Sunday morning in January and the Broncos are preparing to play for the right to go to Super Bowl 60.

What makes this scenario even more perfect, for me at least, is that the incoming snow-pocalypse is all but guaranteeing that I won’t have to wake up at 5am tomorrow morning after either a disappointing Bronco loss, or an exciting win over the Patriots. Either way, the Coors Light will be flowing and I’ll be in no condition to promote physical fitness to the youth of our nation. 

But my future praying to the porcelain gods is a future Blind Owl problem.

Being a Denver fan living in New England, I have heard nothing but how the Pates (new short hand for the Patriots…if you know you know) will be waltzing into Mile High and laying the smack down on the Broncos. I’ll give you Pates fans credit, your team is very good. Drake Maye is legit. Mike Vrabel has a great case to win coach of the year, and Josh McDaniels has proven that he is, by far, one of the best Offensive Coordinators of all time. It’s not fair but it’s true. Y’all have reason to be confident. Plus, the fact that Bo Nix broke his ankle and the Broncos are hitching their wagon to Jarrett Stidham at QB, folks in New England are already preparing to build snowmen in celebration of  an easy trip to the Super Bowl. 

To quote the great Lee Corso…not so fast my friends. Let’s talk about how the Broncos will win this game. 

We’ll start with factors that will impact this game that are out of anyone’s control. 

First, the altitude. In Denver, it is literally harder to breathe than the Pates are used to. You don’t need a Movement Science degree from Westfield to know that breathing is a very important part of playing football. Every process in the human body needs oxygen to work. If anyone has ever been anywhere with some significant elevation and tried to do something physical, it is much harder. I’ve spent plenty of time in the Carson City, NV area and the “thinner” air does make a bigger impact than you think. 

I’m sure there is some way for the Patriots to prepare for this, but there is nothing like living in the altitude. The Broncos are fully acclimated to the conditions and clearly have a cardiovascular advantage over the New England. Not only will the Pates be more tired than the Broncos, they’ll start making bad decisions especially in high pressure situations. Even the Drake Maye sycophants out there will admit that their golden boy has some trouble with putting the ball at risk. Not to mention Rhamandre Fumble-son’s tendency to have the dropsees every now and again.

That brings me to my next point. It is going to be quite frigid up in the Rockies this afternoon. I think last week’s game against Houston showed that Drake Maye has some trouble hanging on to the ball in the cold. Especially against a ravenous pass rush, which the Broncos happen to possess.

This means that science has laid out a nice blueprint for Denver. Turn this game into a track meet. Make the Patriots run. The Broncos should be returning every kick they can to force New England to earn everything. Marvin Mims Jr. is a great returner so that’s great. Not to mention, the Pates kick returner Marcus Jones is also a key part of their defense. Make him move on returns. Kick the ball all over the place, and don’t let them take a play off. On offense, I’m sure Sean Payton will have all kinds of pre-snap motions and quick hitting routes to Jarrett Stidham, but that will also tire out that stout Patriots defense. Then, the Broncos should start attacking the ball and force Maye and company to make mistakes. We’re talking old school defense. First guy holds him up, everyone else attacks that ball. A few fumbles will get in Maye’s head and then lead to more mistakes as he gets winded. 

Now, I’ll take off my labcoat and bust out my old visor and Fox40 whistle and start talking ball. Before you say it, yes I’m blind but I once doubled the win totals for the freshmen football team I coached a number of years ago. We went from 1 win to 3 in my tenure as OC. So I know what I’m talking about.

New England has the superior offense in this game. Even with Bo Nix under center I wouldn’t be afraid to say this. Drake Maye can sling it and the 1-2 punch of Stevenson and Henderson (which sounds like an English engineering firm) is formidable. The spot where the Broncos have a significant advantage is at the offensive line. The Patriots top LT pick Will Campbell has begun to be exposed. He just isn’t standing up to the top quality of pass rushers he’s had to face in the playoffs. Drake Maye knows this and is getting nervous because of it. Defensive Coordinator Vance Joseph also knows this, and I’m sure will be attacking Campbell early and often. Which will force the Pates to slide their protection to that side, which then opens up the other side for abuse by one of the other great pass rushers Denver has. Drake Maye will fumble in a strip sack situation or will be forced to throw the ball a lot faster than he wants to and turn it over. 

A nice shell defense with PS2 locking one side of the defense down will take away those deep routes Maye loves. This means he’ll be forced to make quick decisions or run around. We already established in the science portion of this blog, this is to the Broncos’ benefit. All the sour dough in the world won’t protect Maye from this inevitability. 

As for backup QB Jarrett Stidham, things just need to be clean. The Broncos offensive line has an important job. They need to keep the pocket relatively clean. Now, we’re not talking about giving Stidham 5 or 6 seconds in the pocket. Just keep it clean so Sean Payton can scheme up some quick hitters that keep the offense on schedule, and keep the Pates defense on the field. The big matchup will be the two returners squaring off. Marvin Mims will most likely be in the slot, which means Marcus Jones will be covering him. That’s where the special teams making him return every kick will make a big difference. 

An underrated aspect of football is the kicking game. Like it or not, Will Lutz is the superior kicker. Really? Kicker talk? Yup. It’ll make a difference. Just you wait. 

Now there is one stat out there that is impossible to ignore and gives me and other Broncos fans a safety net of confidence. It’s the simplest fact in this whole blog and it is truly the only one that matters. Even the most obnoxious Bostononian can’t ignore it. It’s what makes them quiver in their warm cars as they're getting their watered-down Dunkin Donuts coffee. Patriots fans like to count all their rings and wins from the past. But all of that was with some cradle robber named Bill Belichick as their Head Coach and some AI created, insufferable tool bag, and notable farm animal Tom Brady at QB. Well, even those two couldn’t avoid this one. Are you ready yet? Here it is…

The New England Patriots are 0-4 in the playoffs when playing in Denver. You read that right. The Pates have NEVER won in Denver in the playoffs. This spans decades and even two millenia. Mile High is a house of horrors for the Patriots. Denver fans know it. Patriot fans know it. Denver's aggressive defense knows it. And you know who really knows it, and can’t forget it as hard as they try? Every single player on the Patriots roster. I’m not saying it’s impossible for the Patriots to come in and win, I’m just saying it’s never been done.

I’ll end with a great quote I just made up. Until you can do something, you can’t. So until the Patriots go into Mile High and beat the Broncos, they can’t do it. And you know something? They won’t. GO BRONCOS.