Updated: Sep 18, 2022
Holy shit. Week 1 was ugly all around. We saw upsets, lackluster offense and a tie. Nobody wanted to see these things. Hopefully, coaches of good teams send their guys to run until their whole bodies demand them to stop. They totally deserve it. Some of the performances were absolutely atrocious. Speaking a atrocities, let’s take a look at how Concret3Cowboy, BrendawnoftheDead and I did in our picks for week 1:
Week 1 Records
Blind Owl: 7-9
Ugh, these records look more like the NFC East final standings than gambling picks. Now, the Cowboy and I aren’t proud of how we did, but we are pretty excited to say that we got to choose a topic for Brendawn to write about this week. That blog he is being forced to will post tomorrow towards lunchtime. Unless life happens and I get busy (forget), but it’ll be up tomorrow. All I’ll say about it is to throw on your yogas and get ready for a seasonal breakdown.
Anyway, let’s get to why you’re really here. Take a gander at our picks for week 2 in the NFL:
LAC @ KC: KC -4
Blind Owl: This game is on Amazon Prime? The old person in me is screaming “Why is a package delivery company showing football games!?!?” I’ll get past that and just accept the fact that I won’t be watching it because I’m the last person on earth to not have Amazon Prime. As for the game itself, we have potential for a really good one. Unfortunately, it’s happening on Thursday Night Football, which basically means it can’t be a good game. The Chiefs looked like they didn’t miss a beat without Tyreek Hill. They laid the smackdown on the Cardinals and it wasn’t even close. The Chargers on the other hand, played a tough game against a divisional opponent and got a good win that will help them late in the year. Pick wise, I have to go with the Chiefs. I picked against them last week and it bit me in the ass, so I’ll pick them.
Concret3Cowboy: I’m just going to bow to the overlords. Andy Reid offenses used to be a lot like Kyler Murray, start off strong then everyone figures them out going into the playoff runs. Will that be the case this year? Maybe, but they looked damn good against the team in the desert. As for the chargers, Allen isn’t playing due to a hamstring injury and I don’t trust Herbert in prime time games. Herbert’s obviously a top talent but I’m unsure he’s mature enough to play in big moments. KC easily wins by 4.
BrendawnoftheDead: Justin Herbert and Patrick Mahommes are the two best passers in the NFL this year, sorry Rodgers you have no weapons. This will be a shootout, possibly of epic proportions. KC seemed relatively unbothered by the loss of Tyreek Hill (which now means I can't use him as a morale reason for hating this team) and put up a 40 burger on the poor Cardinals last week. The Chargers were at least met with some resistance by the Raiders. As much as I want KC to lose, they run the AFC West with an iron fist. The Chargers will keep this competitive but come up short. KC wins by 6.
Blind Owl: Pittsburgh actually surprised me last week. They hung with the defending AFC Champions, who looked bad but that’s for later. Meanwhile, the Patriots offense looked awful. They couldn’t do anything against the Dolphins. The biggest issue looked to be the lack of any kind of blocking to speak of. These two teams are even in their own way. Pittsburgh lost Watt to a pectoral injury, and the Patriots offense seems to have lost any ability. Najee Harris is also going to play which is a big life for the Steelers. I have to be smart here and take Pittsburgh with the points and at home.
Concret3Cowboy: I’m taking Mitch over Mac Jones. The Patriots are doing weird stuff with their OC still, but TJ Watt is going to miss a couple of months so that makes life a little easier. I’m expecting the Patriots offense to get better as the season progresses (much like everyone but especially the Pats), this is because Mac is the type of QB that needs everything to work around him. The addition of Parker will look better in a month or so and the offense itself will probably know what it is. The Steelers just have more stability and Trub has all the tools to be a very good QB.
BrendawnoftheDead: The Patriots offense looked boring and predictable last week. They ran virtually zero play action or RPO plays, you know the stuff Mac is good at. The defense (minus one play straight out of the Little Giants) looked respectable. Pittsburgh tried really hard to lose to the Bengals despite a metric butt ton of turnovers from their defense. Going with my heart here and saying the Patriots win by 3 mostly because if they don't win this one, they're starting the season 0-4.
HOU @ DEN: DEN -10
Blind Owl: I told you Houston sucks. Even when they play incredibly well they end up tying. That is the sign that they are really bad. My Broncos had a rough one against the Seahawks. But that was Seattle’s Super Bowl. You knew they’d play tough. I’m still cautiously optimistic about Denver. 10 points is a big spread, but I think they’ll bounce back nicely.
Concret3Cowboy: The Broncos really let one get away from them. Luckily it was an out of conference game so it didn't matter as much as it could. Two goal line fumbles really screwed the pooch and the defense didn’t want to stop Geno until the second half. Houston shocked the world as much as you can with a tie last week. The Texans are going to be a lot like Detroit, they’re going to play tough close games but lack the talent to really do anything. I swear to god if the Broncos choose to suck again, I will lose it.
BrendawnoftheDead: Houston played over their heads and tied last week while the Broncos played like @$$. Even though their coach is already flip flopping, I don't expect the Broncos score in the teens again. Too much talent on both sides of the ball. Broncos win and cover.
NYJ @ CLE: CLE -6.5
Blind Owl: The Browns were another team that spoiled a revenge game. You can bet Baker Mayfield wanted to beat the tar out of them, But they spoiled it. The Jets got waxed by the Ravens like everyone expected them to. Cleveland is going to ride their momentum to a big home win against a bad Jets team. I wonder if a certain suspended QB will pay for massages for all the Browns after the game?
Concret3Cowboy: Jacoby Brissett is a solid game manager and has a nice resume of experience. He’s much like Teddy Bridgewater though, severely underwhelming behind center. I do think Jacoby has a better arm though. I can’t explain myself too much with choosing the Jets here, I just like crappy teams to cover. The Browns have a great run game but can they really run away on the scoreboard? Maybe, but we can’t all take the Browns.
BrendawnoftheDead: The Jets stink and will always stink. Cleveland will run all over them and hide Jacoby Brissette at QB. Nick Chubb may be the best runner in football and he will act like it against a bad team. Cleveland by 8.
WAS @ DET: DET -1.5
Blind Owl: Both of these teams put on good performances in Week 1. Washington got a win and Detroit put up some points against the Eagles. That being said, I don’t think Detroit has the ability to do that week to week. Washington on the other hand, has some good things going. I was honestly shocked to see the Lions favored, but I guess they’ll always give it to the home squad. I’ll take the Commanders here with the points. Although I think they’ll win outright.
Concret3Cowboy: Here’s my rule of thumb, you only pick Detroit when they’re not favored. Seeing how I picked up Carson Wentz on the Fantasy wire I should stay consistent here, but he could lose this game by himself. 1.5 points is really just a pick 'em. Jared Goff is the worst starter in the league, but he’s got a pretty good running back duo behind him in Williams and Swift. Commanders have a much more explosive offense, oh Gibson and McKissic are pretty good too.
BrendawnoftheDead: I can't and won't pick Detroit even though I'm rooting for them. Neither team is any good, but that can make for really entertaining games. I think Wentz is the better QB, albeit barely so the Commanders get the nod. Actually no, flip the script. The Commanders sold mugs with the silhouette of Washington state rather than DC last week. For that level of organizational incompetence, I have to go Lions even if it doesn't make sense. Detroit by a billion.
TB @ NO: TB -2.5
Blind Owl: I have no faith in the new look Saints. They beat a bad Atlanta team, but it was really close. The Bucs did what they needed to do against Dallas. Despite frequent rumors about Brady getting divorced it seems Tampa hasn’t lost a step. Tampa will win big here. The last thing the NFL needs (or wants) is a divorced and more focused Tom Brady.
Concret3Cowboy: The Bucs have about everyone on their injury list. It’s kind of funny how everyone is terrified to play their starters in the preseason just for everyone to get hurt week 1 (Looking at you Broncos and Justin Simmons, and that horrible performance y’all put on). The Saints beat the Falcons in typical Falcon fashion, and you could see that Jameis wasn't executing well. The Saints figured themselves out a bit before the game ended. Will the Saints still play well against the Bucs without Sean Payton? Probably not but at least their starting QB isn’t getting a divorce. Tom really hates his family, I took it more as a joke when he un-retired before he was retired for two months. He’s legit not living with his wife right now, that favors Tom more on the football field than it hurts him. Don’t trust me with this pick. I’ve almost talked myself out of picking the Saints while writing this.
BrendawnoftheDead: Brady's heart might be in it but it's hard to imagine his head following suit. I trust a distracted Brady more than a focused Winston. Tampa's defense looked solid last week while the Saints made it entirely too interesting. TB by a field goal.
CAR @ NYG: NYG -2
Blind Owl: Another surprising team here. The Giants didn’t look bad against the Titans. They actually came out with a win. Lucky for them, they get another bad team to test themselves. The real losers are the ones that inevitably have to watch this game due to the NFL’s stupid regional game schedule. What hell, I’ll go with the Giants.
Concret3Cowboy: Carolina didn’t look too bad last week against a very good roster in the Browns. The Giants looked pretty good against the AFC’s #1 seed from last season. Barkley looked back to the form that we all want to see, unless you're a Titans fan. I’d trust Daboll over Rhule even after one game for the former. I’m going to stay with Baker though, the Browns got the better of him last week but that’s a team that’s been together for a while against a guy in a new city. I’m not ready to buy into the Giants being a division contender this year, expect them to fall back to earth.
BrendawnoftheDead: I don't trust Daniel Jones, I I don't trust Daniel Jones, I don't trust Daniel Jones, I don't trust Daniel Jones, I don't trust Daniel Jones,don't trust Daniel Jones, I don't trust Daniel Jones, I don't trust Daniel Jones.CAR by 3.
IND @ JAX: IND -3
Blind Owl: 3 points? I know the Colts tied with Houston last week, but 3 points? This is an easy one. Colts all day.
Concret3Cowboy: I don’t know man, the Colts actually have more on their injury report than the Bucs do. They played alot like the Broncos did week 1, dug themselves into a hole and figured it out too late. Except the Colts played a worse team and tied. The Jags fell short of a comeback against the Wentzington Commanders but looked better than people thought. Much like the Pats can’t play in Miami, the Colts can’t play in Duval. This has to be Frank Reich’s last season if they miss the playoffs. How many QBs do you have to rotate through with this roster until the blame is finally put on you?
BrendawnoftheDead: Jacksonville is a BAD team. Trevor Lawerence looks lost despite the immense physical gifts. Indy should be ticked off after tying the second worse=t team in football, look for them to rebound this week. Indy will be king of the JV division and win this by a TD.
MIA @ BAL: BAL -3.5
Blind Owl: I know Miami got a win over the Patriots last week. I know Tua looked pretty good. I saw some saying Tua “carved up” the Patriots. Let’s not get out of hand. That wasn’t the Patriots we’ve all been forced to deal with for 2 decades. The Dolphins will actually have to compete with a team that can score points. Like it or not, Lamar Jackson can move the ball around. Baltimore takes it.
Concret3Cowboy: Miami has more weapons but the Walmart great value Lamar, it’s actually not that close. Miami has more weapons but has a lefty QB that can’t throw past 20 yards, but he does it accurately. Lamar looked really good, albeit it was the Jets but Lamar doesn’t have much to work with. I’m not sure which defense I prefer, Miami went against 3 OCs in the Patriots and the Ravens went against the Jets (need I explain more, it’s the Jets, they’re bottom of the barrel). I like the Ravens to win by a touchdown here in their home opener.
BrendawnoftheDead: Unlike the Patriots, the Ravens have a competent play caller that takes advantage of the team's strengths. Miami's offense didn't do much of anything last week, I don't know if Tua is capable against a decent team. Ravens by 6.
ATL @ LAR: LAR -10.5
Blind Owl: The Rams didn’t look great in their opening night loss to the Bills. But the Bills are very good. The Falcons are not. Unless the Atlanta defense puts all 11 defenders on Cooper Kupp, then the Rams win easily.
Concret3Cowboy: Now, the Rams do have extra time after their opening night debacle against the Bills. Atlanta is traveling across the country after blowing another lead. I really don’t like the 10.5 points though. The injury reports seem pretty clear minus Leonard Floyd (Rams) and Damien Williams (Falcons). I still have faith in Mariota, he had a solid fantasy day against the Saints even though he didn’t score. I see the Falcons losing by less than 10. However, if the Rams really want to show they’re still a super bowl contender, they need to control this game.
BrendawnoftheDead: The Rams got obliterated in front of the entire country last week. They should be ashamed of themselves. As much as it will hurt my fantasy squad, Stafford will probably throw it to guys not named Cooper Kupp once in a while and win this game handily. Rams by 14.
SEA @ SF: SF -9
Blind Owl: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was dead wrong about the Seahawks/Broncos game. I was picking with my heart. I have zero faith that Seattle will be able to keep this up. I have almost as little faith in Trey Lance to be a QB in the NFL. But he’s still the 2nd best QB in this game and the 2nd best on his team. I’m hoping San Fran puts up big points.
Concret3Cowboy: San Fran just lost to the freaking Bears, and your going to favor them over Geno Fucking Smith? Ok, Soldier Field was a disaster (much like the rest of Chicago) due to the reign. Seattle has a better roster than implied, even without Jamal Adams for the rest of the year (he’s pretty overrated anyways). Are the Jimmy G whispers already starting to be heard? The Seahawks might fall back to earth though, they outplayed and out coached the Broncos but really could have lost by two scores. The league is not about “could haves” though. The only thing that matters is the win/lost columns.
BrendawnoftheDead: I got the game wrong, but I told you Trey Lance is going to be a bust last week. SF will win but they won't cover.
CIN @ DAL: CIN -7
Blind Owl: This would’ve been a toss up with Dak Prescott. Cooper Rush is doomed. Cincy wins big, even though Joe Burrow still isn’t that good.
Concret3Cowboy: Am I the only one saying Big Mike is a bad coach? Because everyone else is saying the Cowboys don’t have a good roster, BIG MIKE IS NOT A GOOD COACH. Where do the Cowboys have a weak spot on their roster? Their secondary? They have the defensive rookie of the year, they have a good offensive line, they have a good #1 receiver, a solid tight end and a good linebacking core. Coaching is the problem in Dallas. Joe Borrow made some mistakes week 1, Joe’s a QB that needs preparation and I think the little surgery he had in the offseason for his appendix threw him off his game. Dallas sucks, give me the worst chant in sports, Who Dey.
BrendawnoftheDead: Dallas looked bad with Dak last week. Dallas will look worse with whoever the heck is starting this week. Cincy by a bunch.
ARI @ LV: LV -5.5
Blind Owl: I trusted you Arizona. You let me down. You made me look like an idiot about Mahomes. The Raiders looked good. So I’ll take them because I’m mad at the Cardinals.
Concret3Cowboy: I’m firmly on the spot of the cardinals being poo trash. They paid too much money for a flashy yet mediocre QB. The Raiders are my most hated divisional rival to the Broncos. Josh McDouchebag doesn’t help that cause. In the spirit of not coming in last this week and writing a punishment blog I have to pick the Raiders. So there it is.
BrendawnoftheDead: I think the Raiders are the better team until DeAndre Hopkins is back from suspension. I don't love the 5.5 spread though, so I guess I'm going with AZ to cover. They weren't ready to keep up with KC last week, but that can be forgiven.
CHI @ GB: GB -10
Blind Owl: This is yet another example of how “historical” matchups take precedent over good games. There is no reason this should be on Sunday Night Football other than the fact that it’s Chicago and Green Bay. I know what some AFC North fans are saying, “But the Bears won and the Packers lost! This is a big game!” No it’s not. Aaron Rodgers is going to carve up the Bears defense. Justin Fields is awful and can’t keep up. He only won last week because he was playing Trey Lance. The Packers will win HUGE and I’ll be in bed by 9:30 on Sunday night.
Concret3Cowboy: Does Aaron Rodgers still “own” the Bears? Probably. 10 points is a lot for a divisional game. Much like the Broncos did, Green Bay came out flat and fell flat on their face last week against the Vikings. The Vikings were my divisional pick and they put on a good show to support that. Green Bay bounces back this week. Will the Bears be who we thought they were, or do they get off the hook?
BrendawnoftheDead: The Packers looked awful last week. Guess that's what happens when you spend 1/4 of your salary cap on one guy and you can't pay any other top talent. Chicago isn't good though, they just played a bad QB. GB wins by 11.
TEN @ BUF: BUF -10
Blind Owl: Ha. Bills by 436.
Concret3Cowboy: Tennessee looked bad, Derrick Henry didn’t look like King Henry. Buffalo looked the super bowl favorite in their dismantling of the former champs on banner drop night. Tennessee took a weird step back. They will be lucky to make it to the playoffs this year after being the AFC’s #1 last year. Buffalo is too explosive on offense for this Tennessee team to keep pace and Buffalo is jaded enough as a franchise to not play nice.
BrendawnoftheDead: The only one who can stop Josh Allen is Josh Allen. Buffalo wins and covers.
MIN @ PHI: PHI -2
Blind Owl: Minnesota did what I knew they could. They’re a scary team to come up against. Good defense, an explosive offense and Captain Kirk. I’m still not impressed with Philly and Jalen Hurts. I honestly thought I was seeing this spread wrong when I read it. I figured the Vikings would be favored. But I would’ve picked them anyway, so I’ll take the points as a bonus. Go Vikes.
Concret3Cowboy: Philly put up some points last week.. against Detroit. Both these teams have scrappy defenses. Much like Kirk can keep pace with Hurtz on the ground, Hurtz can’t keep up with Kirk’s arm. AJ Brown played very well last week, so good he deleted his social media so people would stop telling him how good he is. Justin Jefferson is on the other side though. This is going to be a fun game to watch.
BrendawnoftheDead: This is going to bite me (always does when I pick MIN) but I think Philly gets a reality check this week. MIN has a lot more going for them offensively than the poor Lions and they scored a lot of points. Justin Jefferson does the lord's work and trashes Philly's secondary. MIN by 7.